BE LIKEABLE: 4 ways you can be better to work with (480 words, 2 minute read)

'The only thing that matters in the playoffs is if our team is healthy and likes each other. It’s so important we just like each other.’ 

Over the course of 16 years, I was an athletic director and head boys basketball coach. As sometimes happens to those who hold that dual role, excellence required that I pick one. So in 2018, I replaced myself as head boys basketball coach and hired Murray Smith. Murray is a legend in Florida having won almost 800 varsity basketball games, 3 state championships, and coached a couple NBA players. 

Murray is unorthodox, to say the least. He was preparing for his first playoff run as my new head basketball coach, and 3 of the last 4 practices were a 3v3 tournament, a day of shooting contests, and a trip to the bowling alley. It went against all of my instincts. I not-so-graciously asked, ‘Coach, are we going to be ready for our opponent?’ And that is when he quipped the quote that opened this post. 

His team wasn’t excellent that year, but they were fired up to play, and they won that first playoff game. Point taken. 

‘It’s so important we like each other.’ 

I think about that a lot. And, the more time passes the more right I think Murray was. 

Regardless of the industry you find yourself in, I am sure the work pace is furious and the standards increasingly high.

That’s a crushing combination, unless 1) you know your why and 2) YOU LIKE WHO YOU DO IT WITH. 

Since you can't control if you like the people you work with here are four suggestions for being more likeable. 

Smile early and often - Did you know that people subconsciously mirror the facial expressions they see? Our faces might be the most under-utilized tool in our people's smart toolbox. Make sure people like mirroring your face. 

Don’t hesitate to show up a little earlier, stay a little longer - There is a consistent theme amongst the people I have liked working with the most in my 22 years in Christian education. They didn’t hesitate to arrive a little earlier or stay a little longer. It’s easy to like someone who is willing to jump in and do a little more. 

Lighten up - A colleague once took notice of my tendency to use humor in emails and texts calling them ‘light’. Listen up, folks - life is too short and I’m not important enough to be stuffy. Neither are you. Laughter has a magnetic effect on culture. Everyone likes a good joke and likes the people who tell them too. 

Positive touch - this is a touchy topic (see what I did there? Jokes, people!), but the appropriate touch is magical. Hall of Fame college coach, John Calipari, never walks past his players on campus without touching them. Why? ‘Because touch removes doubt and instills belief.’ Who doesn’t like a fist bump, high five, back slap, or side hug? 

We won’t find ‘likable’ in any of our job descriptions. But we don’t like working with people we don’t like either. Be likable! 

‘Bite Down and Don’t Let Go’ is a collection of writings on relentlessly leading yourself and others well. Read about it more here.

Dr. Chris Hobbs is an educational leader with more than two decades of experience. He’s earned a few degrees and won some awards. He’s happily married to his high school sweetheart and they have three teenage children. Life is messy and complicated most of the time. You can follow him on Twitter for all sorts of inspirational thoughts and good laughs.


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